Is honesty the best policy in the apocalyptic world of dating? | thearticle

On 1 April, Tinder announced it was to introduce a new “height verification” tool, to allow women to double check that the Goliaths popping up on their profiles were as tall as they claimed.

The April Fools’ Day prank was one of the more successful this year, with plenty of men enraged at the suggestion, and plenty of women mocking their reactions as an example of the fragility

of modern masculinity. The rage was petulant, with one suggestion doing the rounds being that perhaps Tinder should also introduce a weight verification tool for women (something which may

suggest why the men in question remain single). Yet, that rage was not without reason. Increasingly, though still very much a topic discussed sotto voce, it is becoming clear to us that

there are serious issues when it comes to dating and sex in the West, and that chiefly, the issues are affecting men far more than we could have previously conceived. The “Incel” phenomenon,

used to describe those who define themselves as unable to find a romantic or sexual partner despite wanting one, is slowly making its way into the foreground. _Vanity Fair_ claims we are in

the middle of a “dating apocalypse”. We are also, supposedly, in the midst of a “sex recession”, with over a quarter of young men in the US not having had sex in at least 12 months.

Traditionally, women have been the demographic in society tasked most with body conformity; needing to attain a certain weight, look, or have physical attributes men find appealing. But

increasingly, men are finding themselves subject to the same standards. Some may roll their eyes and say: “about time”. It’s true, the playing field doesn’t ever seem to have been level, and

the sense of getting one over the other side is always sweet. But there is a key difference. Women already knew how thirsty men were. The catcalling, the inappropriate comments, the

conversations struck up on public transport, the following down the street. It is intimidating, and has made many people’s lives a misery. Men, every girl was told by her mother, are only

ever interested in one thing. But what apps like Tinder have done is shown men the other side of the divide. Whilst they may be after one thing, women are after many things, and for every

man who feels he deserves the one thing he desires, there is a woman who feels she deserves everything she wants. And most men don’t have a great deal of them. Traditionally, there was a lot

more onus on the man when it came to courting. He’d do the asking, he’d do the paying, and so on. But now, with online dating, he is the object, the pin-up. He is there to be swiped on by

the woman, and studies suggest that the odds are not in his favour. A recent report from online news company Quartz, revealed that when it comes to dating through Tinder, the top 20% of men

were competing for the top 78% of women. Or, to put it another way, 1 in 5 men has absolutely no chance of attracting more than three-quarters of women. That’s got to be a real kick in the

nads – though given the stats, it seems most men would jump at that chance, but just aren’t getting it. Tinder clearly thought it was having a wheeze when it came up with the joke. And,

given Tinder’s raison d’etre is to get people laid, it probably won’t be too bothered that the people it wound up were people who struggle to do that. But in many ways, height verification

may not be a bad thing. Nor weight verification. In fact, whilst we’re here, we might as well go the whole hog. There should be an income verification, as well as shoulder, hip and waist

size, phallus length and girth, cup size, and everyone with a profile should be made to do an IQ test, to be displayed to all prospective mates. In fact, why stop there? Fertility and sperm

count should probably be made mandatory too, along with resting heart rate, stamina, and what one is or isn’t prepared to do in bed. Sure, Tinder passed height verification off as a joke.

But the reality is, given the chance, many women would leap at that development. In the same way, though a sarcastic backlash, most men would probably prefer to know if a girl is actually

the size she appears in her pics. We are a remarkably superficial bunch – when it comes to something as cold as dating apps, we might as well get on and be honest about it.