How power shifted dramatically in this week’s game of thrones

Last week’s _Game of Thrones_ was absolutely full of maps. It had more maps than a _Paper Towns_/_Moonrise Kingdom_ crossover. More maps than an Ordnance Survey walking tour of a

cartographer’s convention. More maps than your average week on CityMetric. So imagine the cheers of delight when this week’s episode, “Stormborn”, opened with – yes, a map! Enter Daenerys,

casting her eyes over her carved table map (Ikea’s Västeross range, I believe), deciding whether to take King’s Landing and the iron throne from Cersei or a different path. After some sassy

debates with Varys over loyalty, more members of her court enter to point angrily at different grooves in the table as Dany and Tyrion move their minature armies around the board. In fact,

this whole episode had a sense of model parts slotting pleasingly into place. Melisandre finally moved down the board from Winterfell to Dragonstone to initiate the series’ most inevitable

meeting, between The King of the North and the Mother of Dragons. Jon is hot on her heels. Arya crossed paths with old friends Hot Pie and Nymeria, and the right word spoken at the right

time saw her readjust her course to at last head home to the North. Tyrion seamlessly anticipated a move from Cersei and changed Dany’s tack accordingly. There was less exposition than last

week, but the episode was starting to feel like an elegant opening to a long game of chess. All this made the episode’s action-filled denouement all the more shocking. As Yara, Theon and

Ellaria dutifully took their place in Dany’s carefully mapped out plans, they were ambushed by their mad uncle Euron (a character increasingly resembling Blackbeard-as-played-by-Jared-Leto).

We should have known: just minutes before, Yara and Ellaria started to get it on, and as TV law dictates, things can never end well for lesbians. As the Sand Snakes were mown down one by

one, Euron captured Yara and dared poor Theon to try to save her. As Theon stared at Yara’s desperate face and tried to build up the courage to save her, we saw the old ghost of Reek quiver

across his face, and he threw himself overboard. It’s an interesting decision from a show that has recently so enjoyed showing its most abused characters (particularly women) delight in

showy, violent acts of revenge. Theon reminds us that the sad reality of trauma is that it can make people behave in ways that are not brave, or redemptive, or even kind. So Euron’s surprise

attack on the rest of the Greyjoy fleet essentially knocked all the pieces off the board, to remind us that the best-laid plans of Mothers and men often go awry. Even when you’ve laid them

on a map. But now for the real question. Who WAS the baddest bitch of this week’s _Game of Thrones_? Bad bitch points are awarded as follows: * Varys delivering an extremely sassy speech

about serving the people. +19. * Missandei correcting Dany’s High Valerian was Extremely Bold, and I, for one, applaud her. +7. * The prophecy that hinges on a gender-based misinterpretation

of the word “man” or “prince” has been old since _Macbeth_, but we will give Dany, like, two points for her “I am not a prince” chat purely out of feminist obligation. +2. * Cersei having

to resort to racist rhetoric to try and persuade her own soldiers to fight for her. This is a weak look, Cersei. -13. * Samwell just casually chatting back to his Maester on ancient medicine

even though he’s been there for like, a week, and has read a total of one (1) book on greyscale. +5. He seems pretty wrong, but we’re giving points for sheer audacity. * Cersei thinking she

can destroy Dany’s dragon army with one (1) big crossbow. -15. Harold, they’re dragons. * “I’ve known a great many clever men. I’ve outlived them all. You know why? I ignored them.” Olenna

is the queen of my LIFE. +71 for this _one _(1) comment. * Grey Worm taking a risk and being (literally) naked around someone he loves. +33. He’s cool with rabid dogs, dizzying heights and

tumultuous oceans, but clearly this was really scary for him. It’s important and good to be vulnerable!! All the pats on the back for Grey Worm. He really did that. * Sam just fully going

for it and chopping off all of Jorah’s skin (even though he literally… just read a book that said dragonglass can cure greyscale??). +14. What is this bold motherfucker doing. * Jorah

letting him. +11. * “You’ve been making pies?” “One or two.” Blatant fan service from psycho killer Arya, but I fully loved it. +25. * Jon making Sansa temporary Queen in the North. +7. *

Sansa – queen of my heart and now Queen in the North!!! +17. * Jon choking Littlefinger for perving over Sansa. +19. This would just be weird and patriarchal, but Littlefinger is an unholy

cunt and Sansa has been horrifically abused by 60 per cent of the men who have ever touched her. * Nymeria staring down the woman who once possessed her in a delicious reversal of fortune.

+13. Yes, she’s a wolf but she did not consent to being owned by a strangely aggressive child. * Euron had a big win. So, regrettably, +10. ​That means this week’s bad bitch is Olenna

Tyrell, because who even comes close? This week’s loser is Cersei. But, as always, with the caveat that when Cersei is really losing – she strikes hard. Plus, Qyburn’s comment about the

dragon skeletons under King’s Landing, “Curious that King Robert did not have them destroyed”, coupled with his previous penchant for re-animated dead bodies, makes me nervous, and worry

that – in light of Cersei’s lack of heir – we’re moving towards a Cersei-Qyburn-White Walkers alliance. So do watch out.